‘You’re going to need protection!’
Don’t F*ck in the Woods is a 2016 American horror feature film about a group of young people that go camping and end up being stalked by a creature.
Written, photographed and directed by Shawn Burkett (Betsy; Watch This; Theatre of the Deranged II segment ‘Panty Raid’; Bludgeon; The Sleeping Soul), the Concept Media production stars Brandy Mason, Scott Gillespie, Brittany Blanton, Ayse Howard, Roman Jossart and Hannah Herdt.
Don’t F*ck in the Woods 2 is being released in 2020.
Meanwhile, a documentary feature about the production and its success, What Happens in the Woods, was released for streaming on Vimeo on Demand, plus Blu-ray and DVD in July 2019.
“The approach to the framing in the beginning could have also been a bit sharper. I wasn’t a fan of parts of the writing and the killing doesn’t strike soon enough in a film this short and I think that might tease the audience more than they’d expect. Issues aside, horror fans should be entertained…” Adam the Movie God
“If you find yourself laughing at the dialogue, cracking up at the uber-nutty fellow in the rubber suit, or counting the clichés while grinning like a madman, then good – you got it, and you understand that this is a project less about technical refinement and more about cheap, enjoyable thrills.” Addicted to Horror Movies
“It’s got a great sense of humor from start to finish and is one of those films that looks like it was a blast to be a part of. Expect blood and tons of raunchy sex (including copious amounts of boobage) behind every tree in this woods…” Ain’t It Cool News
“With fun frights, exceptional direction and a real-deal monster on display, Don’t F*ck in the Woods comes recommended for those who don’t offend easy and want more out of their modern horror offering than psychological terror.” Fangoria
“It works so well because of the camera angles. One of the more impressive things about Don’t F*ck in the Woods. For such a low budget offering it looks really good. It’s well put together with some imaginative shots such as the one from inside a character’s stomach as the monster rips into her.” Games, Brrraaains & A Head-Banging Life
“Bloody and fun. However, the creature was hit and miss with me. In some scenes I was applauding Burkett and company for the creature and the way it looks. The angles and lighting is perfect to pull the effect off. Sadly, a few scenes show a little too much of the creature and it missed its mark.” Horror Society
“I had fun with the movie and when it relies on horror, it works quite well. But the attempts at pop culture humor are cringe worthy, which could be good depending on what you want. The cast is mostly amateur and does about as well as can be expected.” Marc Fusion
“All of the girls are undressed at some point throughout. On the other hand, it is not the crudely sexist show it might seem on the outside – all of the girls are capable of holding their own both in the face of the crudities bandied about by the guys and against the monster.” Moria
“Burkett uses practical effects to create a monster and deliver enough gross-out gore to please the fans. If you’re looking for a monster flick that harkens back to the VHS era and has boobs, babes, violence, and doesn’t take itself too seriously, then you should enjoy this one.” The Movie Sleuth
“This intended homage to the creature feature and ’80s slasher films veers very close to sex parody territory and you might get a kick out of this movie if that’s your jam, but expecting anything more than T&A and low budget creature effects will leave you grossly disappointed.” StageBuddy
Cast and characters:
Brandy Mason … Meg
Scott Gillespie … Luke / Creature
Brittany Blanton … Jane
Ayse Howard … Alex
Roman Jossart … Mac
Hannah Herdt … Parker
Char Stone … Ash (as Kayla Morgan)
Nadia White … Lacey
Brian Cornell … Conor
Savannah Howard … Video Store Thief
Joe Vollman … Park Volunteer
Deryk Wehrley … Jason
Chris J. Neal … Customer (as Chris Neal)
Ryan Stacy … Ross – Guy in Alley
Aspect Ratio: 1.78: 1